I WAS BORN UGLY

My Birthday.....
Posted 07-22-2010 at 08:23 AM by Seajay
I was born at the tender age of zero. I could neither walk nor talk, I had no teeth and about all I could do was smile, poop, cry, nurse and sleep. My only word was ''Goo'' and it meant everything and nothing.
When I was born I was so ugly the doctor threatened to ''slap my mother'' and dad said ''put him back in doc...... he aint done yet''.....
I was born at home in the same bed I was conceived in by the same two people present. My parents loved me beyond all and my mom and dad wanted many children but God chose to give them only me and they accepted that. They did raise or help raise many kids but that is another story.
My mom told me later that on that day in April it was cold as ''whizz'' outside. There was what we use to call ''whore frost'' on the ground. This is when moisture freezes in the earth and the soil will ''pop up'' sometimes three or four inches high on ice crystals. It looks something like ''frozen grass'' only it is ice. Anyhow. That morning my dad decided that his son ''needed a breath of fresh air'' and according to mom he wrapped me in about every blanket in the house and took me out on the front porch so all the neighbors could see his ''new son''. Mom said he strutted around like a pea cock until all the neighbors noticed his ''bundle of laundry'' with a baby inside and came over for a ''look, see'' and to make a comment.
My parents truly loved me and I was not an accident.
I dont remember much about this because I could not talk because I had no vocabulary except ''Goo'' to ''remember with'' so I just took Mom and Dads word on this.
From that day forward I got older .......

more later..
Seajay the sailor man